This amazing front page headline (I guess they couldn't resist) comes from the Sun.  It's all about a new health and safety (Elf 'n Safety) scare regarding flapjacks (chewy biscuits made from rolled oats, golden syrup or honey, fat (usually butter) and sugar).  A school in Essex has banned triangular shaped flapjacks after a boy was hit in the face with one.  Staff can now only serve square or rectangular ones.

A spokesman for the Health and Safety Executive said: "We often come across half-baked decisions taken in the name of health and safety, but this one takes the biscuit," he then quite rightly pointed out, "'"The real issue isn't what shape the flapjacks are, but the fact that pupils are throwing them at each other."

So, let's analyse the headline - Flapjack - biscuit - whack - hit - rap - being caught doing it - claptrap - nonsense.